What's the difference between a 12" pizza and an artist?
... The pizza can feed a family.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

The appeal of Bad Boys- Open discussion Saturday




Ladies, tell me, what is it with us and a brooding, moody, melancholy man that get us all hot and bothered? I don’t get it. Why are women so turned on by the Sawyers and the Dr. Houses of the world while nice guys often go unnoticed? Women, who can be other women’s harshest critics, can overlook men’s flaws and be the first to give them the benefit of a doubt, looking at them like wounded puppies that need their love and care in order to thrive and reach their full potential. We don’t see the jerk, we see the lost little boy with a tragic past. We rarely consider the possibility that if he acts like an unfeeling, inconsiderate ass it might be because that is what he is. What’s the saying? If it walks like a duck and sounds like a duck? Yeah... that’s what I’m getting at.

Anyway, I’m not above this. I’ll be forever grateful that when choosing a spouse I had the emotional maturity to select a nice guy (the nicest, actually), but that doesn’t mean that I didn’t root for Team Edward just as much as the next girl or that I can’t recognize the sex appeal in Dr. House. What I don’t understand is why. Is it drama we seek? Does it come from our need to be needed, to nurture, to mend a wounded heart? Or is it our inherent insecurities that make us try to win the favor of cantankerous, unloving men because to succeed would be the ultimate validation of our worth?

So gentle readers, what are your theories?

Who are your bad boy crushes (past and present)?

Is there an equivalent for men towards women, (ie: men being attracted to needy weak women)?

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Random Wednesday



Or Wandom Wednesday, if you prefer alliteration.

• I’ve totally fallen off the wagon. I am at my highest non-pregnant weight ever. I have absolutely NO motivation and NO will power. I’ve set so many goals and have lied to myself so many times that I think I’ve given up. But I can’t for the sole reason that I can’t afford to buy new clothes. Any suggestions?

• My kids eat between 5-8 peanut butter sandwiches a week. Is there anything wrong with that? I justify it by buying whole wheat bread, organic peanut butter, and sugar free jelly.

• My kids are bugging me so bad today. They were literally hanging off my limbs all morning until I finally put Max in his crib and Topher in his room. Nap time came early today (and yet not early enough).

Nothing I do is good enough for them. I can spend an hour sprawled out on the floor playing cars and when I get up to do a load of laundry they freak out. I don’t know what I’ve done wrong as a parent, but my kids can not entertain themselves to save their lives. They won’t even play with each other. They are at all times doing 1 of 3 things: attaching themselves to my side while I try to do everyday tasks; actively playing with me; or watching TV. Is it any wonder I let them watch too much TV? (Then I have that to feel guilty about.) And it’s not like I want them to leave me alone so I can watch TV or read a book, I just want them to leave me alone so I can change the sheets on my bed, clean the kitchen, make dinner, or do one of the other hundred chores I have. For the love of all that is holy!

• I just realized that if I stop eating the same diet as my kids (ie: 5-8 PB&J’s a week) that I might not have such a weight problem.

• Chris and I are going to a matinee of Miss Saigon today, so I have that to look forward to.

• Chex bars really are as good as Melissa claims. They're like the perfect combination of sweet and salty and chewy and crunchy. All for just 130 calories. (Which just means I'll eat more of them.)

Saturday, May 9, 2009

And they lived happily ever after.



The other day Topher and I were talking about families. I was explaining to him that when he has children I will be their grandma. This is the conversation that followed:

Topher: but who will be their mommy?

Me: Your wife. The girl you’ll marry. (Assuming he’s into girls.)

Topher: But I want to marry you. I want you to be my wife. (Is it wrong that I’m flattered by this?)

Me: I can’t be your wife. I’m your mommy. And besides, I’m already married to daddy.

Topher: You can be married to both of us. You can be both our wifes.

Me: Sorry, it doesn’t work that way.

Topher: But I want to live with you forever. (He knows...Families can be together forever. That is what they're saying in primary after all. Indoctrination starts young).

By this time he was actually starting to sound distraught so to appease him I said:

Me: It’s ok, we can all live together; me and daddy and you and your wife and kids.

Topher: Yeah!! And we can live in a poor house!

Me: A poor house?

Topher: Yeah, a poor house. You know, in the forest. They have funny roofs made of hay and big doors and windows.

Me: Like a cottage?

Topher: Yeah.

Ok guys, all together now, "Awhhhhhh..."