The other day one of my really close friends was expressing his complete and utter disdain for an individual that he considers "cheap." I know the object of his disdain fairly well and as far as I can tell this was the individual's only quirk. Aside from his frugality he is a really nice, funny, and caring guy. It kind of bothered me that my friend could not look past that single trait and get to know this individual for the great guy that he is. I asked him about it, explaining that everyone has their quirks: I can be fickle and overindulgent (to name just two), his wife, I pointed out, won't ever make a decision, and Chris can sometimes be a little self centered. Why is it that he can forgive us these quirks and still be our friend but the act of being frugal results in an automatic black listing. To which he replied, "I don't know, It's just not something I can get passed."
At first his answer seemed completely unreasonable, but it got me thinking if there are any character traits that I find unforgivable. And I realized that there is... over confidence in women. I'm saying confident to be fair but the truth is that when I'm around a confident woman I'm really thinking that she is arrogant and conceited. And that is so wrong, because when I'm around a confident man I'm impressed by his confidence and find it a turn on. If he's down right arrogant, I might find it annoying but still a little adorable. I know...HUGE double standard, and from me a former femanista. So then I had to ask myself if I rather someone show false modesty, and the truth is yes I would. I guess I reason that even if I suspect their display of modesty is false in a way they're saying that even though they think they're all that, they at least recognize that maybe not everyone else feels the same. (Unless of course they're just looking for even more validation to their wonderfulness, then that's just sickening.)
At first I thought this was a huge sign of how emotionally immature I am, but it's not that I'm intimidate around successful women. It's not a jealousy thing either. I have some amazing female friends, women that are beautiful, talented, smart, kind, and witty. It's just the act of being cocky (specifically from women) that I find repulsive. At the first sign of arrogance a barrier goes up that will usually prevent us from ever being more than just casual acquaintances.
So I guess that's why we all get to choose who we want to be friends with. I'll no longer pressure my friend to be buddy buddy with a cheapskate.What traits are your deal breakers, and/or are you guilty of having any double standards? Spill it!!
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Moving is a bitch!
On August 25th we put our house on the market. We've been really happy in our current home, but we know it's just a matter of time before we outgrow it, and with the boys getting bigger we really want to have a yard. Our thinking was that with the housing market the way it is IF we could find a buyer, we'd be in a sweet position to buy. My hopes were low, but because we weren't in a desperate situation where we were being forced to move, we were fully prepared to wait months for the right offer to come along. My feelings changed as I realized what a huge pain it is to have your home on the market, keeping it not just clean but "show-ready" all the time with a toddler and a preschooler underfoot was near impossible. Also, because I don't have a car I'd always pack the kids in the stroller and take off to the park during the two to three hour window the agents would give me to show the house only to have them show up late just as I was putting the kids down to nap. This happened often and I found it infuriating!
In the middle of September we received an offer. By the time we were done negotiating counteroffers it was September 22, and part of the buyer's conditions were that we be out by October 1st. Say what?! So that basically gave us 8 days to find a home, make an offer on a home, arrange for a place to live until our new home is ready, pack up, find a storage unit, and move. Crazy! And it's not like we were able to put life on hold while we took care of business. We both still had to work and take care of the boys, although I fear they have been seriously neglected during the past week and a half. (Thank goodness for Nick Jr.)
I've been equating the stress and pain of moving to that of child birth. When you're in the midst of it you're thinking, "Why the hell did I do this to myself!?! This sucks!! I'm miserable! NEVER AGAIN!!!" But once you're all settled into your nice new home (or you're holding that precious new baby in your arms) you forget all the pain and you truly don't remember its intensity until you're going through it again. The problem is, I'm still waiting for my baby! We're currently at the mercies of the good graces of my mom and dad who have taken us in until we can close on our new home. The boys are loving it. I'm afraid they'll never want to leave! But obviously Chris and I are anxious (probably not as anxious as my parents) to have our own place again.
Our new home will be in Herriman. We're going to keep a bunch of $5.00 gas cards on hand to give to anyone kind enough to come visit us because man is it far! I never thought we would be so far west. But we looked at a ton of places and for our price range it was the best home for our money. And it really only adds 10 minutes to our commute each way. It's in a great neighborhood with a huge park right across the street and a library, gym, grocery store, gas station, and restaurants all within walking distance. We're really excited.
I want to give a huge shout out to those who helped us during this crazy move!
1. To Julie and Mike who, when I asked if we could live with them for a few weeks, didn't even hesitate to say yes, even when they thought that it could be as long as three months. They are really sacrificing the comfort and routine of their normal lives to accommodate our family and we really appreciate it! My mom provided endless hours of babysitting while I packed and moved, and my dad helped us move some stuff to the house on Tuesday.
2. To our dear friends Pedro and Paula who helped us pack and took time off of work on Tuesday to spend the entire day helping us move.
3. To our friend and favorite babysitter Alex who spent lots of time helping me pack and taking care of the kids. On Monday night when I was the most stressed she took the boys to the park and to Jungle Jim's and on Tuesday she stayed home from school to help us load the moving van and clean the house. She vacuumed the entire house for me.
4. To Judy and Terry for watching the boys Sunday afternoon.
5. To Robin for watching the boys while we house hunted.
We could not have done it without you all so thank you!!! And please let us know when we can return the favor!! If you're upset that you didn't make the list, don't worry, we'll be needing many more kind hearted volunteers to lend a hand when we move into our new home. :)
In the middle of September we received an offer. By the time we were done negotiating counteroffers it was September 22, and part of the buyer's conditions were that we be out by October 1st. Say what?! So that basically gave us 8 days to find a home, make an offer on a home, arrange for a place to live until our new home is ready, pack up, find a storage unit, and move. Crazy! And it's not like we were able to put life on hold while we took care of business. We both still had to work and take care of the boys, although I fear they have been seriously neglected during the past week and a half. (Thank goodness for Nick Jr.)
I've been equating the stress and pain of moving to that of child birth. When you're in the midst of it you're thinking, "Why the hell did I do this to myself!?! This sucks!! I'm miserable! NEVER AGAIN!!!" But once you're all settled into your nice new home (or you're holding that precious new baby in your arms) you forget all the pain and you truly don't remember its intensity until you're going through it again. The problem is, I'm still waiting for my baby! We're currently at the mercies of the good graces of my mom and dad who have taken us in until we can close on our new home. The boys are loving it. I'm afraid they'll never want to leave! But obviously Chris and I are anxious (probably not as anxious as my parents) to have our own place again.
Our new home will be in Herriman. We're going to keep a bunch of $5.00 gas cards on hand to give to anyone kind enough to come visit us because man is it far! I never thought we would be so far west. But we looked at a ton of places and for our price range it was the best home for our money. And it really only adds 10 minutes to our commute each way. It's in a great neighborhood with a huge park right across the street and a library, gym, grocery store, gas station, and restaurants all within walking distance. We're really excited.
I want to give a huge shout out to those who helped us during this crazy move!
1. To Julie and Mike who, when I asked if we could live with them for a few weeks, didn't even hesitate to say yes, even when they thought that it could be as long as three months. They are really sacrificing the comfort and routine of their normal lives to accommodate our family and we really appreciate it! My mom provided endless hours of babysitting while I packed and moved, and my dad helped us move some stuff to the house on Tuesday.
2. To our dear friends Pedro and Paula who helped us pack and took time off of work on Tuesday to spend the entire day helping us move.
3. To our friend and favorite babysitter Alex who spent lots of time helping me pack and taking care of the kids. On Monday night when I was the most stressed she took the boys to the park and to Jungle Jim's and on Tuesday she stayed home from school to help us load the moving van and clean the house. She vacuumed the entire house for me.
4. To Judy and Terry for watching the boys Sunday afternoon.
5. To Robin for watching the boys while we house hunted.
We could not have done it without you all so thank you!!! And please let us know when we can return the favor!! If you're upset that you didn't make the list, don't worry, we'll be needing many more kind hearted volunteers to lend a hand when we move into our new home. :)
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Trickle Down Economics, Let's hash it out
Don't be too disappointed that it is another Chris Post.
I do not consider myself a very intelligent person, but I am generally very
curious and really want to understand some things better, especially politics.
Luckily for me I am surrounded by exceptional family and friends who are sharp
and informed. This election has motivated me to try to dive deeper into politics
than I have ever before attempted. I have many criticism of both of our dominant
political parties but would like to continually provoke discussion on some fundamental topics that I don't hear enough about. I appreciate how professional and classy all of my associations have been as far as not stooping to the loaded manipulative language that we get from our general media. I'm so proud you.
Lately I have been trying to better understand "trickle down" economics and if
this approach has been valuable to our country. I have attached a link to an
article that is critical of Reagan era changes to the economy. The reason I
think this article may be valuable is because of the the information presented from the the Census Bureau regarding household income. (it is all cited and linked to the Census Bureau website) This writer argues that the intention of trickle down policies was never to benefit the poor from the beginning which I don't necessarily believe. But whatever the true motivation, it is important to evaluate how it has done.
Please, if you have time and would like to share your opinion, review the graphs and information presented here and let me know what you think. Is there additional information and statistics that you feel counter the claims in this article? Please share. I just want to use this article to spur a dialogue between friends and family on this subject.
If the information presented by the Census Bureau is correct, it would seem that
a trickle down approach to economics has had a 20 year trial to make its case
and has failed to benefit our society as a whole. Instead, it has increased the gap between the rich and poor. Though the economy has prospered, that money has never made it down to the middle and lower class who has averaged the same salary since the 70's. When taking into consideration how many more women are working and how much more accessible credit is, that fact is staggering. Do you disagree with this
information? Is there something that is not being taken into consideration? Please share what you know on the subject. I don't want people to use the reasoning that if you reject this approach you have to subscribe to the opposite extreme ( Ex. The whole dissing on a Democrat President to defend stupid policies of a Republican one, or vice versa ) I want an honest weighing of pros and cons. I would not ask your opinions if they did not mean a lot to me. Please share your opinion on the subject even if you do not feel entirely informed.
Thank you everybody for your participation. Be patient with me if you feel I am naive, but now is your chance to lay it down. Thank you.
here is the link
http://rationalrevolution.net/war/trickle_down.htm
I do not consider myself a very intelligent person, but I am generally very
curious and really want to understand some things better, especially politics.
Luckily for me I am surrounded by exceptional family and friends who are sharp
and informed. This election has motivated me to try to dive deeper into politics
than I have ever before attempted. I have many criticism of both of our dominant
political parties but would like to continually provoke discussion on some fundamental topics that I don't hear enough about. I appreciate how professional and classy all of my associations have been as far as not stooping to the loaded manipulative language that we get from our general media. I'm so proud you.
Lately I have been trying to better understand "trickle down" economics and if
this approach has been valuable to our country. I have attached a link to an
article that is critical of Reagan era changes to the economy. The reason I
think this article may be valuable is because of the the information presented from the the Census Bureau regarding household income. (it is all cited and linked to the Census Bureau website) This writer argues that the intention of trickle down policies was never to benefit the poor from the beginning which I don't necessarily believe. But whatever the true motivation, it is important to evaluate how it has done.
Please, if you have time and would like to share your opinion, review the graphs and information presented here and let me know what you think. Is there additional information and statistics that you feel counter the claims in this article? Please share. I just want to use this article to spur a dialogue between friends and family on this subject.
If the information presented by the Census Bureau is correct, it would seem that
a trickle down approach to economics has had a 20 year trial to make its case
and has failed to benefit our society as a whole. Instead, it has increased the gap between the rich and poor. Though the economy has prospered, that money has never made it down to the middle and lower class who has averaged the same salary since the 70's. When taking into consideration how many more women are working and how much more accessible credit is, that fact is staggering. Do you disagree with this
information? Is there something that is not being taken into consideration? Please share what you know on the subject. I don't want people to use the reasoning that if you reject this approach you have to subscribe to the opposite extreme ( Ex. The whole dissing on a Democrat President to defend stupid policies of a Republican one, or vice versa ) I want an honest weighing of pros and cons. I would not ask your opinions if they did not mean a lot to me. Please share your opinion on the subject even if you do not feel entirely informed.
Thank you everybody for your participation. Be patient with me if you feel I am naive, but now is your chance to lay it down. Thank you.
here is the link
http://rationalrevolution.net/war/trickle_down.htm
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